Helping progenies to overcome the fear of failure

However, some children become so paralyzed by the fear of failure that they avoid participating in activities that could bring them happiness and make them interesting people. This is not what we want for our children; we want them to have the confidence to take part in activities that bring them joy and make them interesting people.

Overcoming fear of failure

Because children learn through seeing how we react to our own errors and setbacks, it is important for us to provide a good example for them. When you find yourself in a situation where you’ve made a mistake, attempt to reply with optimism or comedy, have a conversation with your kid about what you’ve picked up from your failures, and be willing to pull yourself back up and give it another go. When your kid is having difficulty, you should make an effort not to express concern or anxiousness. This will not escape his notice. Instead, make a concerted effort to project an upbeat and positive attitude. It is a wonderful idea to take this a step further and really encourage and appreciate your child’s blunders. This may be done by using the approach described above.

Encourage the effort regardless of failure

Along the same lines, it is essential to place a greater emphasis on effort as opposed to skill. When your kid is having difficulty with anything, this does not mean that you should just encourage them to “Try harder,” particularly if they have already made a genuine attempt. In contrast, rather than expressing something that is ability-focused, such as “It’s alright if you are second,” you may talk about particular methods that could work the next time instead.


Be affectionate

In most cases, children base their sense of self-worth on what they perceive their parents to think of them. They could get the impression that their parents won’t love or respect them as much if they don’t keep their grades up, do very well in sports or the arts, demonstrate impeccable conduct, and so on. The natural consequence of holding this idea is a dread of becoming unsuccessful. Make it abundantly plain to your kid that you love him or her without conditions, regardless of the child’s actions or decisions, and this will go a long way toward enhancing the child’s sense of self-worth.

It’s likely that you don’t want your kid to be flawless, but you should still make sure he understands this. For instance, you should try to avoid sending the wrong message by worrying about your child’s homework, correcting all of his incorrect answers, or telling him exactly what to write or how to complete an assignment. These behaviors can send the impression that you are micromanaging your child’s education.

This may give the impression to your kid that his or her performance and grades are more important to you than the actual process of learning itself. It’s possible that he is concerned that you will be let down if he is unable to live up to your lofty standards. Make an effort to calm your child’s concerns about this situation. Explain to your kid that you will always love him or her and that you are proud of the efforts, perseverance, and continuing progress that he or she has made. You may also show your pride in him for the way he deals with setbacks and errors in judgment.

About the Author

Lisa Lee

Lisa Lee

I am a Parsons School of Design graduate with a certified teacher's license. At Gooroo, my passion is to educate students through an artist's approach, which requires critical thinking, creativity, and problem-solving. During the elementary years, I think that students broaden their perspective and expression through art, and this skill can be applied to any other fields of study later on. I believe that a true educator can be the key to unlocking every child's potential. Gooroo is a tutoring membership that matches students to tutors perfect for them based on their unique learning needs. Gooroo offers Math, English, SAT, Coding, Spanish tutoring, and more.